Wednesday, December 01, 2004

The M stands for Marvelous

A conversation between two old friends:

S: Good afternoon blankety blank company

M: Hi

S: Hi (?), Oh HI!! I didn't recognize your voice. How are you?

M: Good. Are we still fat?

S: Well, I don't know about you but I AM


M: Are we still Curving?

S: Well Curving didn't do anything for my curves so I quit.

M: OH, what about that one day diet?

S: UGH the wafers tasted like ass.

M: I keep hearing the commercial, "Hi my name is Candy and I lost 10 pounds in 5 days on the one day diet"

S: Me too, I feel like screaming SHUT UP you lying bitch.


M: I need a boob job, {{sigh}}

S: Pfft, I am just gonna get hydraulic jacks

{{uncontrolable laughter}}

M: So how are you?

S: OK, but apparently I am so out of shape that I can not spray gel the underside of my hair with out pulling a muscle in my back.

M: HA I can top that, I pulled a muscle in the shower trying to wash my butt!


M: That's why fat people smell, they just can not reach their "areas" to wash.

S: Hey I don't smell?!

M: No but you pulled a muscle trying to practice good personal hygeine, didn't you?

S: True

M: Steve is out today, he had to see Dr. Costa

S: AAh yes good ole Joey Costa. Everytime I pass his office I think of Steve.

M: You think of Steve bending over with Joey's finger up his ass?

S: NO, I think of Steve bitching because Dr. Costa told him he needed to lose weight and how dare he say that because he has a big round belly and he eats donuts every morning.

M: {{Laughing}}

S: But now, thanks to you I will think of the finger, thanks a lot, Merry freakin Christmas to you too!


M: Um so we are going to Blankety Blank Restaurant on the 13th to have a few drinks and dinner, wanna come?

S: Yea sure.

M: Oh I am flying to Cleveland for the Pats vs Browns game this weekend. And it is Lauren's 1st birthday too!

S: Awesome, I bet she looks better than us doesn't she?

M: Sharon? (Lauren's mom) Pfft, yup, she does. But ya know she is watching what she eats and excersizing.

S: Pfft, BITCH, I watch what I eat....sometimes my eyes get tired.


M: So I'll see you on the 13th.

S: Yup, I'll be there.

M: All this talk about being overweight has depressed me.

S: Ah, go eat something you will feel better.

M: Your right!


S: Bye

M: Bye


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