Wednesday, December 15, 2004

Retired and not spending my kids inheritance

I retired today. From my 2nd job that is. I have been delivering newspapers for the past few mornings. 95 dam newspapers and it totally sucks! I get up at 4:30 am (four-fucking-thirty in the morning people). It's still dark outside for criminies sake. I have done paper routes before, so I don't understand why this one seems like extreme torture to me. It makes me want to pull each an every hair out of my head one by one. ONE BY ONE!

I was picking up the papers by 5 am, grabbing a coffee and then delivering for about an hour. I would get home about 6. Which was just enough time to get ready for work and get the lil ones ready for school, so they could catch the bus by 7:30. I hate starting my day rushing around. It just makes me in a bad mood. Plus getting up that early makes me ready for dam nap by two in the afternoon!

I have been debating whether or not to keep it. Today was the straw that broke sissychong's back. I just will not deal with inconsiderate fucks anymore in my life. (If you are an inconsiderate fuck that didn't get your paper this AM, I'm sorry but smarten up! If you are not an inconsiderate fuck and still did not get your paper, I'm sorry but its your neighbors fault!)

I picked up my papers promptly at 4:55 am, loaded them into my car, and hopped in the front seat with my message sheet. The message sheet is how the newspaper people communicate to the carrier any changes, or complaints to do with the delivery. It was pretty full of typing and I thought, wow, lots of new customers. WELL, it was not new customers, it was complaints! My second day doing the route alone and I had complaints! Stoopid complaints such as: do not put paper in between front doors, leave on front porch, the doors wake up the dog. WTF? Fuck the dog, so he barks once when the paper arrives, whats the big deal? Teach the stoopid fuck to open the door and get it for you instead of barking. Don't blame the paper carrier. I could see if I was making alot of noise. But no I am considerate. I open the storm door very quietly, and I hold it to close it so it doesn't slam. Isn't that nice of me? Inconsiderate fucks don't think so.

And people for the most part do not care about their paper carrier. Most people do not leave even one outside light on. A new carrier can not see the number on your house, plus, I have found myself tripping over Christmas light cords and lawn ornaments. And then there was the lady yesterday, that came outside to start her car. She was getting out of the car, so I said excuse me, I was going to say good morning and hand her, her paper. Well she looked at me and kept right on walking to the house and into the front door. And she closed the fucking door, closed it up tight!

So this morning after I saw all the complaints, I thought, my fingers are frozen already just putting the papers into the car, these people are inconsiderate, it's way to early to be out of bed, I AM NOT DOING THIS ANTYMORE!

I took the papers BACK out of my dam car, kept one for myself and went to get coffee. Now before ya'all start thinking I am an asshat, I did call as soon as I got home to let them know I would not be delivering the papers. I did that for the nice people, like the man at the nursing home that waits in the lobby for me to bring him his paper. That call was for you dude, thumbs up!

So people be nice to your paper carrier. The job sucks and it doesn't pay much either.

Happy Wednesday!

2 Comments:

Blogger Cece said...

why that RUDE BITCH! you should have thrown her paper right at her head! er. I don't get the paper though. I never have time to read it and our local paper sucks.

11:12 AM  
Blogger Michelle said...

Congratualtions on early retirement. Sometimes the extra things we do for cash are just not worth what it does to our sanity. We give the mail carrier a gift every year at Christmas; we always took care of the paper person too but we don't have one anymore.

10:55 PM  

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