Tuesday, July 26, 2005

I woke up this morning wondering if we, as parents, EVER stop worrying about our kids? I suppose I should ask my mother. I know at the moment, she would say no. Seeing as how I have taken 2 of her grandchildren and moved us 300 miles from the only place we have ever lived. I think she would definitely say that a parent never stops worrying.

About a week and half before we left for Maine, my oldest son moved back to Massachusetts from Maine. Why, you ask? Well that is a long story and one that I am not sure I know all the pieces of. Ya know when something, someone tells you just doesn't make complete sense? That's how I feel about his reasoning for moving back to Massachusetts. Anyway, I digress. So, he left a job and a cute apartment in Maine and moved back to Massachusetts.

It's no secret my oldest son has caused me many grey hairs between the ages of 14 and 19. I worried about him through those years. Is he hanging out with the wrong people? (Yes) Is he getting into drugs? (Hmm) Would he get into trouble with the long arm of the law (yes)

While he was in Maine I worried about him. He has never lived anywhere besides our former city in Massachusetts, he had no family close by. He had no car. How would he find a job, etc. He over came those hurdles.

Now, he is back in Massachusetts and the worrying starts again. He has no place to live, he hops from one friend's house to another carrying his things in a bag like a hobo. He and his girlfriend broke up (slut, cheater, bitch). He lost his job because she (slut, cheater, bitch) wouldn't give him his uniform and they fired him for not having it. He is heart broken and alone.

We talked for a long time the other night. Me, trying to help him decide which path to take with his life. He doesn't want to return to Maine. Why must he choose the difficult road? He and my 15 year old daughter are coming to visit this weekend. I am dying to see them both. It seems like so long since I have seen their beautiful faces. I miss them so.

Why must parents worry forever?


Blogger Charlotte in Pa said...

Hi, Sissy! I think it's because if you are a GOOD parent.. then it's the ultimate love. You would truly rather die than have harm come to them. That makes it hard. Plus, it makes the good times so much more enjoyable. Remember how proud you were of him when he got his shit together and went to Maine? I think that he's had a taste of what it's like to be a responsible adult. He'll want more of it eventually. It's hard, but hang in there. I'm sure you did a fabulous job with him, and it will all come together eventually. I am thrilled that YOU are happy in Maine!

1:20 PM  

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